Nicky The Good

First off, thank you guys who read the first blog. I guess it did well enough to get another go at this. With that said, my bracket is in fucking shambles. Im DFL in the only pool I entered, 44 out of 44. I am terrible at brackets and I am terrible at gambling.  Ive been in gambling retirement for some time. But, after Nicky named me his gambling guy, I decided to batten down the hatches and get back to work. I used to think I knew hoops. I averaged 3.2 ppg in high school and was a manager for the OU basketball team. But, clearly I dont, and the pressure is on to provide actual winners. Ive never been a numbers guy. I got a C in college algebra. I needed to develop a model that looks at the players lifestyles and not at the players physical capabilities. The top factor in my model is food. Of course, the fat guy picks food. But college kids will do anything for food. College kids also love technology. Thus, its time to put the system to use. Here are my Saturday picks based on the top yelp restaurant in that teams city. 

Punch! (Illinois) v. Subway (Duquesne)

I’ve been going to Champaign all my life. I’ve never been to this place, but the name alone is awesome. The food looks amazing and the drink list is spectacular. The reviews rave about the employees. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said about the restaurant at the top of the list in Pittsburgh. Subway. This was shocking to see, I had my editor double and triple check, and Subway it is. Nothing else needs to be said, the Illini by a landslide. 

Illinois -10.5 

The Foundery (Dayton) v. The Parish (Arizona) 

The Parish describes itself as a Southern Fusion Gastropub. Shut the fuck up. Sounds high class and that aint what we are looking for. I’m taking the Foundery here all day. Its got a rooftop that overlooks a minor league baseball field that looks prime for crushing beers in the summer. This one was easy. 

Dayton Moneyline 

Wooden City (Gonzaga) v. Big Mill (Kansas)

I didn’t even need to do research on this one. I once got food poisoning in Lawrence and it nearly killed me. Big Mill, your city has scarred me, and your coach wears a hairpiece. Pack your bags. 

Gonzaga -4.5

Hawthorne & Wood (North Carolina) v. The Peoples Kitchen (Michigan State)

The first picture of Hawthorne and Wood was a waiter pouring a bottle of wine with a white napkin. Yikes. This is a gambling blog, not a Pookie and Jet outfit review blog. Because its Michigan I went directly to the beer list for The Peoples Kitchen. A+. January February Izzo. 

Michigan State +3.5

Cornbread (Iowa State) v. South Fork Public House (Washington State)

Listen, I know I talk about alcohol a lot, sue me. But this one will be a shocker. There is absolutely a zero percent chance a town surrounded by corn can have bad cornbread. Big boys gotta eat. 

Iowa State -6.5

The Meeting House (Oakland) v. Tamasha (NC State)

The Per Capita Income in Rochester Michigan makes me think a lot of the reviewers are stay at home moms who like to drink red wine at 10 am on a Tuesday. Tamasha is indian, and indian food fucking rocks. 

NC State -6.5

Aba (Texas) v. Stock & Barrel (Tennesee)

I’ve been to both these cities multiple times and I am starting to think yelp’s number 1 might be a crock of shit. This one is going to be a blind taste test. Aka I looked at the google street view of both restaurants and Stock & Barrel has a great little nook to smoke a post dinner camel crush. Sorry Aba, keep it weird. 

Tennessee -6.5

Tiger Mama (Oregon) v. Ooh de Lally (Omaha)

Sorry to the good folks in Omaha. But this place has 6 reviews. Omaha is home to the 7th richest guy on the planet and he still lives in a ranch home he bought in 1958. I assume most people in Omaha still eat supper and think going out to dinner is a “treat”. Tiger Mama is a Korean small kitchen, and the best dish is Kimchi Udon. Excuse me while I go get my stu feiner towel after reading theri menu. Oregon in a runaway. 

Oregon Moneyline

Best of luck.