I feel like my man Mintzy is on a 24/7 redemption tour. As KB put it best on the Yak, “he’s a 40 year old man who’s always in trouble.” He ain’t wrong and with trouble comes the need for forgiveness.
If you’ve been following along the Barstool Universe, Mintzy decided to enter a poker tournament despite the fact that he was required to be at a company event on a day in which there was a chance for overlap between the two events. Bad move. A Mintzy move. His legend grows.
Dave took major issue, which has lead to Ben Mintz once again kicking off a redemption tour special. His big moment will be this Friday as announced by Big Cat. It’s the Mintzy Pro Day
With that said, here are my suggestions for some events:
#1 FACE DOWN CROWD SURF FULL COURT SPRINT
Mintyz took the world by storm with (maybe) the first ever face down crowd surf. The guy just put his full body and nutsack directly on his legion of fans as they propelled him from the stage, to the back, and back the stage (while eating something).
Let’s replicate this moment!
Get a dolly and have Mintzy lay face down on it. Using his arms and legs he’ll need to push himself across the Barstool Basketball Court for 4 laps (Going the full length of the floor and back is one lap).
Each RETURN lap will require Mintyz to eat a random item while making his way across the floor, the same way he grabbed a food item and ate it in the original video (above). Mintzy must finish the food item before completing each lap. For safety purposes, let’s use non-solids. (i.e. ice cream, oatmeal, banana). We don’t need our buddy choking while trying to redeem himself.
#2 PITCH A BRICK (WATCH)
Ben Mintz is the #1 Brick Watch Salesman in the world, but not many have seen him in action. I think his Pro Day is the perfect spot to showcase his talents. If anything, he’ll be able to show how easy it is to sell a superior product, thus paving the way for an army of future Brick Watch Salesmen. Mintzy will literally be creating jobs for Americans.
With that said, I think Mintzy should have to pitch to this fucking psychopath from TikTok.
The #1 Sales Trainer in THE WORLD, Andy Elliott.
Can Mintz get past Big Andy E? I doubt it, but what if? What if we got Mintyz in front of this dude with the goal of selling him a Brick Watch? We let Mintz go 1 on 1 with this Andy for 5 minutes and let Andy and a group of other very qualified people (Big Cat, Jersey Jerry, Nick Turani etc…) come up with the final score.
#3 HOT SALAD
There’s fast banana, but is that really exciting at this point? Is it painful? Nope. You know what brings the heat? You know what sucks? HOT SALAD. Back in my college days when I was a full blown FRAT BROSKI one of the thing us pledges how to eat were hot salads. It’s basic as fuck, but god damn did I fucking hate doing this. You get a massive bowl of lettuce and dump hot sauce all over it. Contestant has a timer to beat and finish the hot salad.
Imagine the photo below but with 5x the salad and 5x the hot sauce
Real simple, would probably be funny. If you think this idea sucks, I also understand.
#4 (ACTUALLY) SHAVE THE BALLOON
Wake Up Mintzy has always shown Mintzy shaving even though he’s not shaving at all. I’m thinking there’s no blade. The man is just wiping shaving cream off his face.
So let’s throw it back to the cult classic movie, Heavyweights and challenge the Apache Relay!
Mintzy needs to shave 3 balloons with a real razor within an allotted amount of time.
I think these are pretty good, especially options #1 and #2. To me, not doing a Face Down Crowd Surf challenge would be egregious, but what do I know, I’m just a genius with tons of charisma and good ideas.
Nicky The Good 
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